Craggy Island

Craggy Island was the primary setting for the Channel 4 sitcom Father Ted.

Contents 1 Description 2 Places of note 3 The "real" Craggy Island 4 References

Description

Craggy Island is a bleak, desolate community with no redeeming features whatsoever and where nothing ever happens, populated by various lunatics, a small Chinese community and one Maori. The weather is often harsh and just about every house and business is shoddily built. As testament to the island's enduring unpopularity, the English government often uses its coast for dumping nuclear waste. The place isn't mentioned on any map and is frequently used by sailors as a navigational device (because, in the words of Father Ted, the general consensus is that, if you're heading away from the island, you're heading in the right direction).

Despite there rarely being any news of note, the island has its own broadsheet, called The Craggy Island Examiner. Because they never have anything worth writing about, the staff usually blow up any small event or piece of gossip into a major scandal, such as when a peeping tom's whistle was stolen. The 'story' helped make way for a full colour pull out on whistles as a way of exploiting the bored locals' excitement (one resident even remarked that Craggy Island was becoming like Boyz N the Hood). However, Ted was once seen reading an edition with the alarming headline: "Crazed Murderer Still on the Loose"; it was implied in the episode that this person may be Tom, an insane retard who persistently observes the coast wearing his "I Shot J.R." t-shirt, usually while sporting a gun.

The only remotely modern places on the island are an internet cafe, a cinema, a lighthouse, an isolation tank, an aviary and a golf course, although the latter consists only of a small strip of grass amid some rocks. There are also several significantly unimpressive landmarks (see below), such as "The Magic Road" and "The Field". The island has a long-running feud with its almost identical counterpart, Rugged Island, which is ministered to by Ted's arch nemesis, Father Dick Byrne.

Judging by their licence plates, all the cars on Craggy island were registered in Laois, Ireland's only double landlocked community. ^[1]

Places of note

The Holy Stone of Clanrichert: Formerly at Fermanagh but moved to Craggy Island (as it was not doing very good business) the holy stone is the main attraction of the island following its upgrade to a Class II Relic after someone was lured to it. It was briefly removed following an altercation between Father Jack and a Bishop, when Jack caused the relic to become lodged in the bishop's anus. ("Tentacles of Doom")

The Field: While not actually a field, the area has fewer rocks in it than most other places on the island. The field also hosts Fun Land, a yearly carnival sporting unimpressive 'rides' as Freak Pointing, The Whirly Go Round, The Crane of Death, Goading the Fierce Man and The Ladder, the latter being simply a ladder propped against a wall.

The Craggy Island Crazy Golf Course: The course consisted of one hole with the easily discarded obstacle of a windmill. ("Entertaining Father Stone")

The Picnic Spot: Even bleaker than other parts on the island, the picnic spot is home to a few deckchairs, a sign, and a list of rules, which includes no swearing. The spot is watched by Mr. Benson and his whistle. Its only regular visitors are an aggressively territorial couple who drive away anyone else wishing to sit at the lone picnic table. They do, however, abide by the 'no swearing' rule religiously, telling Father Ted to 'fup off' and calling him a 'backstard'. (The Old Grey Whistle Theft)

Vaughans: A pub located in town that is visited by many of Craggy Island's Chinese residents. (Are You Right There, Father Ted?)

O'Leary’s: Another pub. The threshold of this pub is the site of the mysterious Mud Angel. Legend had it that every Friday night, about closing time, the mysterious figure of a man appeared in the mud outside the pub. It was later revealed to be Father Jack rolling in the mud in a drunken stupor.

O'Leary's: A small shop, which provides services ranging from groceries to book-makers to record sales. It is run by John and Mary O' Leary who regularly are involved in domestic violence moments before the priests enter the shop, only to portray the picture of marital bliss when in public.

The Magic Road: A bizarre freak of nature where nothing works like it is supposed to. Father Jack once fell victim to the road’s trickery while on holiday with Ted and Dougal at the nearby caravan park. His wheel chair rolled up the road and he fell off a cliff at the top. ("Hell")

The magic road is based on a real life location in Co. Sligo, where an optical illusion makes a road appear to defy gravity. This very location was advertised in a Sligo tourism video presented by Dermot Morgan, some years before Father Ted was filmed.

Saint Kevin's Stump: A tree stump of above average interest that is frequented by people from the caravan park. ("Hell")

Saint Patrick's Hill: The hill is a popular spot for Lenten pilgrimages with people like Mrs. Doyle. Pilgrims climb to the top of the hill and are then chased back down with 'a big plank'. (presumably based on Croagh Patrick, which is often climbed barefoot by pilgrims on the last Sunday of July). ("Cigarettes and Alcohol and Rollerblading")

Saint Clabbert's: Clabbert’s, also known as "Jurassic Park", is a home for elderly priests and sufferers of the hairy hands disease. ("New Jack City")

Golf Course: Just one small strip of grass amid some large rocks, with a hole in it at the end for the golf ball.

The "real" Craggy Island

The real Craggy Island seen from helicopter shots is Inisheer. The actual parochial house used in the series is on the mainland in County Clare, near Lisdoonvarna. Vaughan's pub, where Ted is confronted by a crowd of angry Chinese in "Are You Right There, Father Ted?", is also located in Kilfenora.

The football match at Ted Fest is used to award the honorary title of Craggy Island to the winning team.

References

v • d • e Father Ted Main characters: Father Ted Crilly • Father Dougal McGuire • Father Jack Hackett • Mrs. Doyle Supporting characters: Bishop Leonard Brennan • Father Noel Furlong • Father Larry Duff • Minor characters Episodes : Series 1: Good Luck, Father Ted • Entertaining Father Stone • The Passion of St Tibulus • Competition Time • And God Created Woman • Grant unto Him Eternal Rest Series 2: Hell • Think Fast, Father Ted • Tentacles of Doom • The Old Grey Whistle Theft • Song for Europe • The Plague • Rock-a-Hula Ted • Cigarettes and Alcohol and Rollerblading • New Jack City • Flight Into Terror Christmas special: A Christmassy Ted Series 3: Are You Right There, Father Ted? • Chirpy Burpy Cheap Sheep • Speed 3 • The Mainland • Escape from Victory • Kicking Bishop Brennan up the Arse • Night of the Nearly Dead • Going to America Crew Graham Linehan • Arthur Mathews • Andy DeEmmony • Declan Lowney • Geoffrey Perkins Other & Related Pages Craggy Island • Rugged Island • "My Lovely Horse" • Feck • Ted Fest • Hat Trick Productions

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